Stimulating and unconventional takes on the world of work & personal development designed to provoke you into fresh perspectives
Today’s provocation
No conductor?
An orchestra with no conductor??
Yes, this is the Orpheus Chamber Orchestra. Founded in 1972. No conductor. Having many talented musicians among my friends I know that the status, style and personality of a conductor is instrumental, from interpretation of the music to a unified performance. How do Orpheus do it?
They say it starts with direct communication and open mindedness within the orchestra. And outside? It’s down to the quality of relationships they have with their many partners, from composers to up-and-coming soloists.
Shared leadership isn’t for every context but it is happening across many sectors from construction to healthcare. And it starts with a team that is willing to communicate directly and be open minded. How do your team rate on these qualities? At Clennam we offer an emergent team coaching approach which can be ideal for deepening and broadening real direct communication. How about a direct conversation to find out more?
Rooaaaring with laughter
We take a lot of things seriously that we used not to – and rightly so. It’s not infrequent for a client in their 40s to come to coaching armed with a recent diagnosis which has given them reassurance that they are not alone and the hope of some ways of thinking and working which will be helpful. Coaching can work really well because it doesn’t pathologise – it recognises and builds on what is already present.
Today I found myself laughing with one of these clients from a place of deep despair at the rigidity and critical spirit of one of her colleagues. She is going to ask her 8 year old son to choose a favourite dinosaur which she will imagine she sees as she walks into her colleague’s office, which she does several times a day.
Why am I more tired in online vs face to face meetings?
Produced at the height of the pandemic, Nadler’s research on ‘Zoom fatigue’ is my ‘go to’ research for normalising coachees’ experiences of being more exhausted by Zoom than by meeting in person.
Simply put, our brains have to work harder to create a convincing 3D person when we are experiencing them in 2D. So, part of our brain attention is occupied with making a real human being out of what is in front of us.
The solution? Meet up in person or communicate verbally without camera.
Don’t believe the headlines
‘Piano Man Hits the High Note with Success at 88’
I think it’s absolutely wonderful that Ray Eveleigh has passed his grade 8 piano with distinction. However, when I heard that headline I thought – wow, that’s incredible! And of course, it is. It’s also important to note the following contextual factors:
- He’s been playing the piano all his life
- He had the encouragement of his wife and daughter
- He had the time and the health to do this
If you’re contemplating an ambitious goal in your life, make sure you have the resources around you which will set you up for success and the motivation to put the time in.
Lay down your weapons of violence
I found myself sharing the proposition that ‘busyness is a form of violence’ with one of my wonderfully capable and high-achieving coachees last week. It’s a paraphrase of Thomas Merton, that unobtrusive but searing observer of modern life.
As someone who is still absorbing the implications of this little hand grenade of an epithet in my own life, I find myself wondering which weapons of busyness could I lay down in this hour? Today I think it’s multiple tabs open at once.
Napping
Don’t knock it if you haven’t tried it. Here’s my nap challenge for you and endorsed by many of my coachees and the Sleep Foundation.
- Set a timer for 15 minutes.
- Find somewhere really comfy to nap (a first aid room in an office, a bed or sofa or even a ZapNap).
- Put on ear and eye covers if needed.
- Close your eyes for the duration of the timer.
- Don’t worry about getting to sleep. Don’t worry about your mind buzzing. Just stay still and notice your breathing with eyes closed.
- Repeat regularly and reap the benefits.
Read moreIn arguments both people endlessly repeat their positions, over and over. It saves a lot of time if you restate the other’s position.
Eugene Gendlin, 1978
Emotional States
Training yourself to be aware of your own and others’ emotional states is a key part of ensuring that conflict is productive and is a core part of many of my coachees’ agendas. Check out the Centre for Nonviolent Communication for more information.